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June 21, 2008

jinx

paranoid person
should have faith and think good thoughts
but panic's easy

For some reason I have gotten myself in a tizzy about my water breaking early. I don't know why this suddenly feels like an imminent danger to me. In my other two pregnancies my water didn't break until the doctor did it for me, but now I am completely paranoid and almost convinced it's going to happen any second now. At 19 weeks, that would not be a good thing to happen.

So I thought I'd blog about it, and by calling out my fears publicly, and looking irrational and crazy, I will somehow be able to jinx it from happening.

I am just disturbed by this feeling of Imminent Doom that I have. The single artery umbilical cord only worries me a little bit, the clot is no fun and keeps me worried, but right now I'm not thinking about it. I am all-consumed with worry about finding myself in a puddle of amniotic fluid at any moment. Why is this worry hitting me like this? Why does it feel like more of a prediction than a stupid worrywart thing? Can I blame hormones for making me crazy?

Is it November yet?

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Comments

Oh, honey, I am sooooo sorry. It is perfectly normal and OK to be worried and freaking out. Feel free to call our your worries whenever. Your pals are here.
XOXOXOXOX
Rach

Just catching back up. Didn't know you had baby on the way. Congrats!

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